Today is Sunday and here i am sitting alone in my boss' room working on her research project and some of my late reports. I could've refused when she asked me to come on my day-off but i didn't. Instead, i accepted it without hesitation. Yes, something's wrong with my brain that has successfully turned me into a freakin' workaholic mom.
I should've stayed at home on weekend like this. Spending time with my beloved son and hubby but i didn't do that. I prefer to work than spending time with my family. I curse myself for choosing this option.
To tell you the truth, is not that i don't want to be with my family but i just can't stand with the tense when they meet. Facing them at the same time really drain my energy to the lowest level. Hurting my heart and gives nothing but pain and heartache. That's why i choose to drown myself on tasks and reports. It's not right but it's oke!
I'm sick and tired with people's judgement towards me. I don't care! Or maybe i do care but i choose to ignore them. All i ever wanted is to be understood. Is that too much to ask?
The moment i say positive affirmations, I step out of the victim role. I am no longer helpless. I acknowledge my own power (Louise Hay)
I guess enough for this dwelling session now let's get back to work.
3/4/2011
-rf-
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